Can you get High on High Fives?
Here's an audio clip so you can listen to the Mom Tip while you fill up the dog's food and water.
Hi, I’m Regan Barnes from Momivate, and this is your two-minute Mom Tip empowering you to elevate your mothering experience.
I took a child psychology class in college. My professor was strongly opinionated, biased towards his own published research which claimed that the only effective form of discipline is a system of rewards and punishments, that our children are basically like Pavlov’s dogs.
Well, now that I'm a mom, I hereby declare this professor's viewpoints as over-simplified and incomplete. Instead, I feel that the concepts of Positive Discipline are much more thorough in covering a broader scope of our children’s emotions.
That's not to say I never use rewards or punishments. I use them a lot -- specifically the rewards! And that’s where the two theories coincide, which is a good clue as to the validity of that concept. Over the years of integrating “rewards” into real-life motherhood, I’ve come to realize that high-fives are about all the reward a child really ever needs. Oh, and otter-pops for going pee all by themselves. Tee hee!
Really, though, rather than invest in cavity-causing candy, or in a supply of little toys that later become stifling clutter, I just offer that awesome kid with the good behavior a high-five. And he's happy, and I'm happy! And I'm not ashamed to mention another compelling fact: slippin' skin is free.
Palm patting is universally accepted as very valuable -- even though it costs nothing. And because it’s free, I can give it freely. As Positive Discipline teaches us: the more, the better.
Other similar rewards include a cheer! a hug! a thumbs-up! a pat on the back! the "A-OK" sign! capturing the moment on the camera! offering to call Daddy or Grandma to report the success! The KIND of positive interaction isn’t nearly as important as how OFTEN it’s offered.
The genuine joy my child sees on my face as we celebrate their victory is infectious -- one of the few infections we want to spread.
Moms, try increasing these simple rewards in the lives of your children, then share if this practice elevates your mothering!
two minute mom tips!
Because sometimes our attention span has to match our children's. Audio and transcript included!