 Photo Credit: Nathan Dumlao on Unsplash.com Here's an audio clip so you can listen to the Mom Tip while you eat chocolate! Hi, I’m Regan Barnes from Momivate, and this is your two-minute Mom Tip empowering you to elevate your mothering experience.
I was asked to speak in church on Mother's Day a few years ago. I'd heard so many women say that they avoid church on Mother's Day because they can't stand the guilt as the speakers dish about their perfect moms. Since my mom really is perfect, and talking about her would definitely make other mothers feel guilty, I spoke about Mary, the mother of Jesus, instead. No, that didn’t help the guilt, but it let me illustrate how each of our children is also one of God's children and even though we’re merely - and severely - mortal, He still allowed us to mother them. The key to accepting our imperfect selves is knowing, while incredibly sweet and adorable, our children aren't perfect either. They need to see how we handle missteps so they can handle their own! (Mary, the mother of Jesus, couldn't have that line of reasoning, since her son was, indeed, perfect. Oh well.) Instead of wallowing in guilt, I choose to wallow in gratitude -- and I mean really roll around and get myself covered in it!!! I am so very thankful to BE a mom, even though it humbles me every minute of every day. Gratitude goes to God for giving me eight children to teach and learn from and practice forgiveness with (both asking and giving). Gratitude goes to my mom for setting a beautiful example of dedicated motherhood. Gratitude to my husband for supporting me in so many ways, and loving me, even though I yell at his quiver full of kids every once in a while. And Gratitude goes to my children for loving me in spite of me. Mom, when feelings of guilt get you down, let gratitude lift you back up! Then share if this practice elevates your mothering!
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 Photo Credit: Timon Studler on Unsplash.com Here's an audio clip so you can listen to the Mom Tip while you stir the simmering stove top supper! Hi, I’m Regan Barnes from Momivate, and this is your two-minute Mom Tip empowering you to elevate your mothering experience.
Our families are like TEAMS, and in general, teams have a goal: to WIN! But we're not competing against other families so what does this mean, to win as a family? Our family decided it means to LOVE GOD and LOVE ONE ANOTHER, no matter what, and to make sure each family member feels that love based on how we interact with each other. Now, this plan for victory requires a LOT of PRACTICE -- like, DAILY -- just like sports teams practice daily! So, this indicates that we need to spend TIME with our family on a DAILY basis -- not just living in the same house watching the same TV, but actually interacting! Conversing! Playing! Eating Meals together… Supporting one another in various endeavors! ... and praying and laughing and crying and hugging and high-fiving and working and hobby-ing together... We also determined that some areas of behavior are like games of varying importance. Yeah, yeah, we want to win them all, but even the best coaches choose to let a team play less-than-their best sometimes so they can use their energy more wisely in higher-stakes games. Can we stand to "lose" a little in low-stakes games like scrimmages? Yes... but when it comes to things like loyalty, selflessness, and forgiveness -- these are like the Play-offs! The World Series! The Super Bowl! -- so we need to be playing with all our energy, effort, and fortitude. Yeah, fortitude -- isn’t that an awesome word? I often encourage my kids to upgrade their attitudes, and from now on, I'm going to suggest they try Fortitude!!!) Mama, what are the high stakes games in your family? What are the areas that you can minimize efforts in order to have the energy to win at the high stakes games? Share with us if practicing winning from this perspective elevates your mothering!  Photo Credit: Kaylee Garrett on Unsplash Hi, I’m Regan Barnes from Momivate, and this is your two-minute Mom Tip, empowering you to elevate your mothering experience.
Lately, our family has been discussing, “what does it mean to be a Family Team?” Initially, the question of "Who is the Coach of the Family Team?" seemed to have an obvious answer: Mom and Dad! But, thinking about the role of Coach more specifically, we decided that Heavenly Father better fits that description. For one thing, Mom and Dad are out on the playing field of Life right along with our kiddos. We're figuring out the Game as we go, too. We might have been on the field a little longer than the children, kind of like being Seniors in High School versus the Little Leaguers. Heavenly Father, on the other hand, is so knowledgeable about the Game -- being that He is omniscient, and all! He has studied the opposition and knows their tactics… and in the case of the Family Team, we don't compete against other families, but rather against those forces that are trying to break down our family. These forces come in all shapes and sizes: scary things like immorality and addictions; ugly things like vulgarity and violence; things that disguise themselves as good, like over-scheduling or over-indulgence; sneaky things like selfishness and pride. Heavenly Father asks a lot of us, just like any good coach would. He requires us to build our muscles individually, in preparation, long before we compete in games. He wants us to workout on our own as well as show up to practice day in and day out, and scrimmage a bit. He knows what our individual challenges are and sets up situations to help us develop the skills we need to overcome those weaknesses. He has developed the Ultimate PlayBook, aka the Scriptures! Mama, try hiring God as your coach -- the only salary he requires is Love! Love God, Mama! He’ll fill your heart with even greater love! Share with us if this practice elevates your mothering!  Photo Credit: Rojan Maharjan on Unsplash.com Hi, I’m Regan Barnes from Momivate, and this is your two-minute Mom Tip, empowering you to elevate your mothering experience.
Have you thought of your family as a team? It’s a fun way to look at how our family interacts. Just as sports teams have different positions to be played, we can define those roles for our family team. If I got to pick the team Captain, it would be Jesus Christ! He sets the example. He calls the shots. He takes the heat for us when we fail, and he encourages us to get up and try again. Our family team Cheerleader is ME, as the Mom! Okay, that might be a little gender-typing going on ... but for real, I LOVE cheering my kids on! What about the Waterboy? Could that be... Dad?! Ha, just kidding... although, in our family, he does a good job of making sure we have the Living Water in our lives. Who’s the Referee or Umpire? Hmmmm... in our family, that’s definitely our oldest child... He has already discovered the right way to do everything, so he makes sure everyone else lives up to that! Other position titles are sport specific, like quarterback, pitcher, goalie, scrum half (that's a rugby term!), attacker (lacrosse!), or chaser (quidditch). I'm sure each of us can think of ways our individual children fit into these various roles... and interestingly, we can mix sports metaphors on our family teams, because of the way WINNING is defined differently! Mama, take some time today to think about each of your children’s contributions to the family team. Offer them positive feedback about how they’re playing the game of life! High fives and fist pumps go a long way in cheering on our family teammates, and they play the game better when they know we’re their number one fans. Share if this cheerleading practice elevates your mothering! |
