 Photo Credit: Andrew George on Unsplash.com Here's an audio clip so you can listen to the Mom Tip while you clean out the car. Hi, I’m Regan Barnes from Momivate, and this is your two-minute Mom Tip empowering you to elevate your mothering experience.
Here's a throwback to high school physics: remember the Law of Conservation of Matter? Here's a little reminder with an illustration Imagine a glass of milk and chocolate syrup. Mix those together: something has definitely changed, but the amount of total liquid is still the same as before. Even if you drink the milk and the cup appears to be empty, the liquid still exists -- it wasn’t destroyed -- it just changed places. Nothing was created, nothing was destroyed. Amount-wise, it all stayed the same regardless of the color change or change of place. Well, unfortunately, I tend to notice a Law of Conservation of Goodness in my life as a mother. I have several areas of my life in which I strive for improvement: getting the laundry done! being patient and calm with my children! exposing my children to good music! including the Lord in my day-to-day life! making nourishing meals! Managing my time so I get some one-on-one time with each of my kids as well as with girlfriends and my ever-lovin' husband! cleaning out the car! and the list goes on and on and on and on. So I set goals. And I work towards improvement. But it seems like when I get good at one thing, I get worse at another thing. Dangit! That's what I mean about the Law of Conservation of Goodness -- that it appears I can neither create nor destroy the total amount of goodness in my life. It seems stuck at a constant and just changes form, changes color, changes places, changes which goal it applies to. However, in all honesty, I've determined that this is a FALSE law. Oh, it might apply to energy and matter in physics. But as I am getting old enough now to have a little hindsight, I can see a little success in my attempts to get better, even though it looked like it was balanced out by regression in a neglected area. I am definitely better off than if I hadn't ever made the attempts. Journaling has allowed me to gain this more accurate perspective, and I recommend this practice to you! Mom, genuinely give yourself credit for how you’ve gradually improved over the years, and pat yourself on the back, resolving not to get discouraged as the path of progression stretches out to the horizon. Use a journal to record your thoughts. Then share if this practice elevates your mothering!
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 Photo Credit: Tim Wildsmith on Unsplash.com Here's an audio clip so you can listen to the Mom Tip while you scrub the toilet! Hi, I’m Regan Barnes from Momivate, and this is your two-minute Mom Tip empowering you to elevate your mothering experience.
There’s a phrase that I like to hear as often as possible from my children... "Okay, Mommy." I love to hear it because it means my child has agreed to whatever torture or punishment I have inflicted upon them… brushing teeth for instance or having to read a book before getting screen time. These are things that I consistently request from my children, and I love it when they decide that it’s okay. But I also hear myself saying "Okay" often.... which may be where my kids have picked up on it. I'm glad I've set a good example in that sense. However, I'm not sure I always use the word “Okay” in the right context… for example: "We're going to get your pajammies on now, okay?" "Let's go brush your teeth, okay?" "You need to read a book BEFORE watching a movie, okay?" What does my "Okay" in these circumstances get across to my children? Is there really a choice in the matter? What if they’re inclined to say, "No, Mom, that's NOT Okay," would I rescind the request? Change my plans to fit my child’s lack of willingness to obey? I've determined that I need to pay close attention to my use of the word "Okay" -- and stop tacking it on the end of the instructions I’m giving. If my "Okay" means "Do you understand?" then I need to replace it with, "Do you understand?" I've been working on dropping the Okay from my instruction sentences for awhile now, and it’s a tough habit to change. I just repeat to myself: "Stop saying Okay all the time, Okay?!" Mama, what verbal messages are you sending that you might not really want to be sending? Brainstorm some alternatives and start conscientiously enhancing your communication! Then share if this practice elevates your mothering! |
