Too Tired to Have Sex

As a young teen, I was a "mother's helper" for a family that had five little kids under age 7 or 8. On Saturday mornings, the dad of the family would come pick me up and drive me to their house. I would either entertain the kids while the mom did chores or she would tell me what chores to do while she sat down to breastfeed the baby. I don't know where the dad went -- to work, maybe?? He would show up a few hours later and drive me home.

One time as he was driving me home, he put his hand on mine and said, "My wife is too tired to have sex. Can you help me?" I was horrified and wanted to jump out of the car and yell RAPE!! I pulled my hand away and said, "No, just take me home." Luckily, and gratefully, he dropped me off without saying -- or doing -- anything else to me.

Looking back, I should have called his wife and put her on high alert. But I was only 13 and wasn't 100% sure I understood his request correctly... wasn't I already helping by doing chores for her so she wouldn't be so tired?? I really didn't know what to do and just felt so relieved that he actually did take me home and didn't call me anymore.

I've never told anyone that story -- not even my husband. But it has shaped me, oddly -- I decided to have my kids four years apart so I wouldn't get too tired to have sex. Of course, sometimes I'm still too tired, but I trust my husband when I ask him if we have sex often enough, and he says yes.